number_eight: (Athena - Apollo/Dramatic AU)
Sharon ([personal profile] number_eight) wrote2008-09-03 04:01 pm
Entry tags:

12.D.3 I never believed in the Devil, till I met you.

I was running.

It was one of those feelings that I enjoyed once I was finally out of that cell. I was part of the Colonial Fleet, and so jogging through the hallways of Galactica gave me a sense of freedom. Helo knows. It's not that I can't fall asleep; it's that I don't want to be confined anymore.

[Locked from Helo]

And then I ran into Lee, drunk, in the pilots' rec room. I don't know what got over me; it was so idiotic, really. I was upset, trying to prove a point that I wasn't Boomer, that I was Sharon. Athena. Someone he could trust. I was so frakking tired of everyone saying things behind my back, and so I decided to try to talk to him.

All I wanted was for him to say my name. To realize that I was just as human as he was.

"You're human? Well, now you definitely get to feel like a human. Don't worry. You haven't had it like this-- but you're gonna love it."

In his drunkenness, I recalled everything from the rape and ran away from him. I couldn't stop crying. Why? Why had he done this to me? I had taken a belt and wrapped my wrists with it, just to show him how much I trusted him not to hurt me, and then he went and did this to me. Why?

"You trusted me. You gave someone a little precious piece of yourself, and they tried to kill it, just to make it hurt. Welcome to being human... Sharon."

We argued, I cried, and then he begged me to hurt him. As if taking out some revenge on him would make up for what he had just tried to do to me, or how he'd always felt about me. No. No, I couldn't do that. Sure, I backhanded him once, but it wasn't hard. There was nothing in it, despite my anger at him.

And then we frakked.

God, sometimes I hate you, Lee, for what you did to my life. Sometimes I hate you for what you did to me that night. And then sometimes, I remember that there wouldn't be an "us" at all if there hadn't been all that pain to begin with.

Muse: Sharon "Athena" Agathon
Fandom: Misc. TV/"Battlestar Galactica"
Word Count: 380 (not including quotes written by Lee!mun)
OOC Note: This version of Sharon is AU, not canon, and based off RP. The Helo referred to is [livejournal.com profile] callsign_helo and the Lee is [livejournal.com profile] arrow_of_apollo.

[locked]

[identity profile] number-eight.livejournal.com 2008-09-04 11:32 pm (UTC)(link)
He should hate mine, too. But I know him, and he'll blame you instead.

We should stop. It's not healthy. You don't love me and I don't love you.

[locked]

[identity profile] arrow-of-apollo.livejournal.com 2008-09-05 05:49 am (UTC)(link)
I'm half responsible. He'll be at least half right.

If it was that easy to just stop, we would have.